Be Him Again......

Why do I only have the ambition to write when I'm feeling emotionally unwell?
Awe well... Here I go.

You're not interested in my life.. my whereabouts.. my talents and joys...
I don't want you to act like your interested, I want you to be truly interested, and thrilled in the process of searching my character.

Let me skip hearing her cry's in the morning and hear joined laughter instead.

Play with us and enjoy it.. please...

Remember what you taught me and return to being my example.

Be firm and find maturity so I can respect you once again, as an adult.

I hear words but no actions... those I love you's never last long.

Know me Dad... Want to know me.

Know us...

I tire of crying in dark corners and dodging situations with your name.

You were the strength we could count on, the protection we needed.

I am left crippled within, pondering on the future I held so close... one that included you.

You are going to miss moments in my life that are to be the greatest.

I'm missing moments in yours that we'll never talk about.

You said "Im a really really great friend, who could be like a father."
Well I say, we don't... I dont.. need someone who's 'like' a father... but rather, A father. And your friendship means nothing to me when I only hear your voice through speaker phone and hear stories from my mothers 'drunk impression'.

I'm not going to lie... it's difficult to see a path of forgiveness when this hurt is so evident.